As Chase chose what kind of costume to wear to the Halloween Dance, he couldn’t help but remember what had happened Monday. Did Lee really agree to go with Jeffrey Sanders? She had never gone to any dances before…even when he and Ashley asked her to go as a group.
He sighed. When he, Ashley, and Lee still seemed like friends.
Choosing on a simplified version of batman, he took it to the changing room. The walls of the changing room were vaguely reminiscent of those bathroom walls…
The memory had remained fresh in his mind for every single hell-filled night and day. How could he explain it to anyone? The one person who was supposed to understand couldn’t understand anything about it.
He pounded his fist into the wall. The pain his hand emitted was trifle to him; trifle to the pain of remembering.
How could they understand? How could they understand that it wasn’t his fault? How could she understand it?
Biting his lip, his skin formed goose bumps while he remembered the look of utter resentment Lee had given him last Monday. Without Lee, he had no friends. Without Lee, there was no color and no reason.
She had been the only person he depended on. They had been friends since God knows when. Every single secret had been shared between them—even secrets that no one else knew about. She had been the first person he told about Ashley.
To him, there was nothing that he couldn’t say to Lee. She was his real best friend. He didn’t mind getting teased about having a girl as his best friend. If anything, it seemed like she wasn’t a girl at all. She was more than that—more than a girl, and a guy.
Even though many of his guy friends had pardoned this as love, Chase was assured that somehow, it wasn’t love. To him, love meant that you would have to feel something different about the other person—such as he had when he found out that Ashley was cute.
But, towards Lee, he had never felt anything different. Maybe it was because they had known each other forever, but even when Lee wore make-up and high heels for the first time, he didn’t feel anything. As a matter of fact, he was more concerned for her safety in those four inch heels.
So, why was it so hard to not hear her voice or even to look eye to eye to her?
Rebecca had sensed the change in her son the moment he walked in to her kitchen two weeks ago, on Friday evening. It was an unexpected change—a very sad kind of change.
She tried nudging it out of him, but he wouldn’t give. When she called Ponthip the next morning, Tip also said that something was wrong with Nalee, as well. But, it was some kind of awkward wrong with Nalee.
Now, as Becky wiped down the family table, she wondered how little Lee was doing. That show of events on the following Saturday of that strange Friday was enough to say that some serious business went down with Lee and Chase. And, that made Becky feel uncomfortable.
Becky practically helped raise Nalee. Because Nalee and Chase were best friends, Lee would sometimes spend the night at the Thompson house and she would sometimes see more of the Thompson family than her own family.
Becky didn’t mind; she had always wanted a daughter. Lee was never a burden—and it kept Chase happy to have a good friend.
But, then things changed because the two of them were growing up, obviously. Expectedly, Lee stopped sleeping over, even though she would still be over until one or two in the morning either playing video games or studying for what seemed like a very hard topic.
But, it was the consistency that the two shared: they seemed to have no one else but each other. That was probably why Becky had a feeling that there was something going on between the two of them—something deeper than friendship…
Of course, that all changed when Ashley came into the picture. Becky started hearing about Ashley when Chase and Lee were in third grade—a new girl had just moved in from Bluewater and wanted to be friends with Lee.
As the years went by, Becky heard more and more about Ashley than Lee, even though Lee was still Chase’s best friend. By eighth grade, all Chase ever talked about was Ashley. All Chase ever thought about was Ashley.
That was probably when Lee didn’t even stop by the house anymore—when the house started getting emptier and when Becky saw more of Chase’s guy friends than his best friend.
She was fine with it. She only thought Chase was growing up. But, when she asked Tip, she said that Chase would still call Lee every Sunday night, like always. So, Chase might’ve actually been ignoring Lee.
Becky went back into the kitchen, passing an old family picture. Seeing her parents with Chase made her smile. Whatever was going on between the three friends was something that she felt they needed to solve themselves. She shouldn’t interfere—because, she still had faith that Chase would always choose the right option.
She didn’t close her phone—no, it was actually ringing. This was more progress than last time. But, of course, she didn’t pick up—Chase was led into voicemail.
“…Lee, I’m not going to say that we need to talk…Just wanted to let you know that I’m still alive…” With a sigh, he closed his phone.
It would be pointless to go to her house; he had done that and she refused to come out of her room.
He still remembered the words that she said when he knocked: Don’t come back. Go die somewhere.
His cell phone blared, and only a thin thread of hope made him wish that it was Lee. Of course, the thread broke; it was Marianne Sutters.
“Hi, Mary.”
“Hey, Chase. Are you doing anything?”
“No. Not really.”
“Well, we just wanted to know if you’re going to come to the park.”
Omar had planned for a barbeque at the park… “Later.”
“Don’t be so late. I miss you.”
“…Yeah.”
“Say, could you…?” Her conversation and endless sea of questions continued to spring from an unknown well.
