The rest of the week had been a blur. What had happened on that day was certainly a shock…and somehow expected.
Janie admitted it: she thought Dustin was cute, and at some point in her time at Pleasantview, she had a crush on him. But, that was when she first moved in—when he was still fresh with Angela.
But…what was that on Thursday?
Needless to say, she totally ditched the barbeque that the Broke family was throwing…
Now, Tuesday morning, Janie kept clicking her pen, still thinking about that from Thursday, even though she was in the middle of a test.
She looked down at her answers. Most of the fill in the blanks had been scratched out countless of times—she was totally unsure of her answers. She studied last night, since this was her AP Economics class. She had always been good at economics, but she totally didn’t understand it today.
She looked up at the clock. God, class was almost over. She barely had half of the test finished.
Upon impulse, she guessed on almost all of them, and the bell rang as she finished her last one. She handed her test in and quickly ran to the library. She dreaded going to the lunch room, where Dustin was at.
It was no surprise to see Janie in the library; she frequented the library, because inside, she was still a nerd.
What surprised her was seeing Jeremy and Ginger, reading out of the same book. She smirked as she walked to their table and sat down. “Well, well, well…” She crossed her arms. “Is something going on?”
Jeremy shook his head.
“Jerry and I decided to actually study. I forgot my science book and my library card, so he’s checking one out.”
Janie blinked her eyes. “You’re in AP Bio?” Last she heard, Ginger hated science.
“Yeah, didn’t you know? She’s in my period.” Jeremy flipped a page. “Fifth period Jackson.”
“I thought you sucked at science…”
“I suck at Math. I rock science.” Ginger searched her backpack and pulled out her notes.
“Aren’t math and science the same?”
“Not biology and math.”
“Got food?” Jeremy asked.
“Uh, sure.” Janie luckily packed some snacks into her bag earlier in the morning. She brought out some bags of cookies, chips, and cereal.
“Thanks.” With one quick movement, Ginger stole the bag of cookies and ripped them open. She dumped however many cookies it took to put in her mouth.
“I think I lost my appetite,” Jeremy complained.
“How do you lose your appetite?” Ginger asked.
The two went off into their own little world, leaving Janie alone to face her own reality: what was she going to do? She can’t hide here forever; he’s bound to find her, one way or another…
“So, what was that the other day?” Jeremy suddenly asked.
“W-what was what?”
“I couldn’t talk about it since Lilith was around; but, what was up with that Broke kid?”
“What happened?” Ginger’s eyes looked like they were about to pop out of their sockets.
Jeremy smirked. “Dustin Broke smooched Janie in first period.”
Ginger slowly turned to Janie, her mouth wide-open. “W-what?!”
“It-it wasn’t anything like that-!”
“Um, I know a kiss when I see one. Your lips touched, so it was a kiss.” Jeremy leaned back, a satisfied grin on his face. “Does he like you, or something?”
“I-I don’t know.”
“Jerry. He freaking kissed her. If he didn’t like her, I don’t think he’d kiss her.” Ginger looked at her best friend. “So, did you kiss back?”
“O-of course not!”
“Hm, so you did.” Jerry’s arrogant smirk was getting on Janie’s last nerves.
Ginger laughed. “How was it?”
“Okay, you guys are acting too calm about this. I freaking kissed Lilith’s sister’s boyfriend!”
“So you did kiss him back!” Ginger whispered.
“I-if I did, then it’s still wrong!”
“So?” they both asked.
“It’s wrong! In every goddamn way possible!”
“Do you like him?” Jeremy asked. Was it just Janie’s imagination, or did Jeremy’s tone sound different? Was that a gleam in his eye that she saw?
“Why?” Her guard was up.
“If you like him, then I think it’s okay.” Jeremy’s too casual voice was lined with a fine poison: jealousy. “And, it’s not like he gets along with Angela. God, they barely even look at each other. I heard that she’s only in it for the sex.”
“…They’re not virgins?” Janie sounded a little too surprised. Though she was one to tease, it still sounded too…weird to hear it being said.
Her too surprised expression made Ginger stifle a snicker. “Course they’re not. You’re probably the only virgin here…” As she said so, she clung to Jeremy.
Janie’s eyes widened. She slowly got it into her mind that something was going on…something deeper, possibly--“W-wait…you two…?”
“Oh, you didn’t know?” Ginger asked. “We’re sex buddies.”
“I thought you were gay!” That was directly intended for Jeremy.
Ginger pecked his cheek, and he swatted her away. “Nope. He is not gay; he didn’t take it in the ass. And, it was only once, too—it didn’t count.”
Jeremy shook his head. “She’s still my best friend, though.”
“Yep, you Itty Bitty Dick.”
Jeremy glared at her. “Small Breasts…Made like a washboard.”
As they continued with the stifling conversation, Janie was glad that they had ventured far from the original topic. But, it still surprised her to see how intimate they were—see how far they’ve come with each other. She would’ve never thought that they had gone that far with each other. They honestly looked more like siblings than what might’ve been lovers.
Their arguing kept going on, so Janie decided to look through her economics book…only to realize that almost half of her test resulted in a complete failure.
“…kiss like a hippo…” As Jeremy and Ginger kept going at it, Jeremy took a glance at Janie. Her distressed look while looking in her economics book was something he never saw. She was an expert in economics, so it wasn’t something that she would look so distressed in. “…What’s wrong?” he asked Janie.
“…I-I think I might’ve failed my economics test.”
“What?! I thought you were good in economics!” Ginger’s face was just as shocked as Janie’s had been.
“I-I am.”
“So, what’s wrong? Did you study?”
“I-I did.”
It must be Dustin. But, Jeremy couldn’t say it. He was Janie’s best friend, so he knew that she was uncomfortable. As Ginger and Janie continued to talk, Jeremy thought of Janie’s situation.
The lunch bell rang and interrupted Jeremy’s thoughts.
“Well, I guess I’ll see you after school…” Janie began to pack her things.
“Okay. Let’s go, Jerry.” Ginger stood up, grabbing her things, and grabbing Jeremy’s arm.
“Okay, okay. I’m getting up.” As he said so, he did so. He looked at Janie. “Good luck…” He grabbed his back pack. “And, don’t think about it too much. I don’t think he really wanted you to think about this that much. You’re only in high school; maybe it’s his way of saying that-.”
“Saying what?” Ginger asked.
Jeremy then remembered that Ginger was there. “…It’s nothing. Let’s go; you know that Jackson is waiting at his door to catch those that are tardy.”
“Oh, yeah, we’d better hurry. Bye, Janie!”
Janie waved.
“How was school?”
Janie stopped petting Melvin and turned to look at her father—head of surgery at Pleasantview Community Hospital, Calvin Alders—coming through the door. He set down his blazer and briefcase.
“It was fine.”
“Hm.”
“Why do you ask? You barely ask me.”
He shrugged. “I just felt like I should know what’s been going on. I feel as if I and your mother have been drifting from you.”
Janie shrugged. “It’s fine if you drift. I won’t be home next year.”
“Hey, don’t say that.”
“It’s true, though. Mom likes to say that, too.”
“She’s just worried about you.”
“Worried that I won’t be home next year?” Her sarcastic tone really showed how she totally doubted what her father was saying.
“Janie…Your mom is worried because of that—even if she doesn’t sound like she’s worried, she definitely is.”
“O-o-okay.”
“I don’t like that tone of voice, young lady.”
“Sorry.”
“Why don’t you ever try understanding me and your mom? Why do you have to be so rebellious?”
“I’m not.”
“You’re our only child. When you have a child, I hope you know what your mom and I have to go through.” He sighed. “And, I hope that your child will be just like you…so you’ll know what your parents had to go through.”
Janie shrugged. She got up and walked towards the door.
“Where are you going?”
“Going to hang out with Jeremy and Ginger.”
“…Don’t be out too late.”
“I might be. I’ll just get dinner outside.” Before opening the door, the door was already opening. Her mother—the head of maternity at the same hospital, Lisa Alders—stepped in.
“Going out?”
She nodded.
“I’ve already picked up dinner. You’re not going anywhere without having this dinner.” She quickly made her way in.
“I’ve already ate.”
“Don’t play that with me. There’s not a single dish in the sink.” She had already come into the kitchen. She set the things down and started taking out the takeout boxes. “Go wash your hands and hurry up.”
If she were to run out now, she would be free. She knew her parents wouldn’t come after her. She knew that if she were to run out, she would have fun and not have to think about her parents breathing down her back.
If she were to run out, she knew that her parents would worry, nonetheless.
So, she trotted down the hall and made a right to the bathroom.
“Have you been talking to Janie, lately?” Lisa asked her husband.
He set down his reading glasses and his book. “I’ve tried. How about you?”
“Even if I did, it would seem like I haven’t.”
“…She’s a lot like you, you know.”
Lisa small smile revealed how she felt about it. “I know. She’s more like you too.”
“Stubborn like me. Rebellious like you.”
Lisa nodded. “Yep. I was just like that with my parents…you remember, don’t you?”
He nodded. “Just like yesterday. I guess it’s really our faults that she’s like this.” He shifted in the bed. “I just hope she doesn’t turn out like us.”
The memory of their shared past came crossing through their eyes. Thirty years ago, they met…and fell in love. Twenty-nine years ago, Lisa was pregnant—but, after three months, it was to no prevail. The child was lost. The child was lost, and the two were married.
And, it felt like they never saw each other again: Calvin moved to finish his medical school, whereas Lisa was put in medical school. When they became successful doctors, they moved back into each other and it took about another three years to conceive.
After Janie, no other children came. For Lisa it became hard to conceive again—ironically, she became the head of the maternity department.
But, during her first pregnancy—the very first one—Lisa had never felt so alone. Even if she was already getting married to Calvin, she had never felt so strange…so like a caged bird. And, now that she only had one child—a girl, just as rebellious as she had been—she wished her little girl would never feel like she was.
Feel like she was caged.
